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| Above: Ralph and I - Sept 2011 in Edinburgh, Scotland. |
In June 2011 Ralph and I met when we attended the same local drama group, he had been attending for many years and I had decided as a gift to my mother (the Thespian) I would join an acting group with her, even though I'd be the one back stage helping with costume design and set making. Trust me, you don't want to see my acting!
I had managed to pick the one day they were auditioning for their supper theatre, obviously my mother was happy, I on the other hand, a bag of nerves and to top it all off, who did I get paired up with to read my part? Ralph, who'd been staring at me as if I was a piece of muck on the bottom of his shoe the WHOLE evening!
Well instead of this making me more nervous I thought I'd show him!
I'd act him off the script! Which I think took him by surprise, but more so me as I had no idea that showing off would actually work as usually the universe has a way of putting you in your place when you do something like that. I actually got paired up with two other men after that? Which in turn made it worse as I didn't have the same inspiration to show off those second and third times, even though Ralph was still sitting across the room as if he despised my presence? What had I done to this man!? I didn't even know him!
The night got even more entertaining, my mother lost her bag, we found it, her debit card was missing, the police were called, we ran home to meet them at our house instead of the hotel we were using the conference room in. I suppose it's the right place for that much drama considering it's a "Drama Group" which in most cases more drama is going on back stage than in the actual play but we were the new kids on the block, no one knew us and we'd stumbled in there, unprepared, completely baffled, and all over the place. Let's just say we knew how to make a first impression! What made it worse that it turned out no one had stolen my mother's debit card, my father had used it the day before and forgot to put it back after he was done. Obviously, she had forgotten. (Insert cringe here)
Sooooo as you can imagine, we contemplated whether or not we would go back and show our faces the following week, for we'd have to explain. And we did! God knows why? Again, the whole evening was spent with weird looks across the table, this time with the guy sitting next to Ralph. Who before I slag off can I say is a lovely lad and we are great friends now but at the time came across creepy and I could feel myself being undressed. (Not realizing this feeling actually was probably coming from Ralph when I wasn't looking).
Well instead of this making me more nervous I thought I'd show him!
I'd act him off the script! Which I think took him by surprise, but more so me as I had no idea that showing off would actually work as usually the universe has a way of putting you in your place when you do something like that. I actually got paired up with two other men after that? Which in turn made it worse as I didn't have the same inspiration to show off those second and third times, even though Ralph was still sitting across the room as if he despised my presence? What had I done to this man!? I didn't even know him!
The night got even more entertaining, my mother lost her bag, we found it, her debit card was missing, the police were called, we ran home to meet them at our house instead of the hotel we were using the conference room in. I suppose it's the right place for that much drama considering it's a "Drama Group" which in most cases more drama is going on back stage than in the actual play but we were the new kids on the block, no one knew us and we'd stumbled in there, unprepared, completely baffled, and all over the place. Let's just say we knew how to make a first impression! What made it worse that it turned out no one had stolen my mother's debit card, my father had used it the day before and forgot to put it back after he was done. Obviously, she had forgotten. (Insert cringe here)
Sooooo as you can imagine, we contemplated whether or not we would go back and show our faces the following week, for we'd have to explain. And we did! God knows why? Again, the whole evening was spent with weird looks across the table, this time with the guy sitting next to Ralph. Who before I slag off can I say is a lovely lad and we are great friends now but at the time came across creepy and I could feel myself being undressed. (Not realizing this feeling actually was probably coming from Ralph when I wasn't looking).
The tradition in our drama group is that after all our readings we go downstairs to the hotel bar area and talk over a couple of drinks, non-alcoholic or alcoholic you pick your poison. Well this time, we decided to stay. The only two seats available were next to Ralph or the other lad who had been paying more attention to the buttons on my shirt than the script so of course I placed myself down next to Ralph so no one got the impression that I had accepted these miscommunicated advances. My poor mother then sat down next to him instead :D
All of a sudden, Ralph started to speak... an actual conversation not directed by a script! I was mesmerized! I hung on every word he said, and all I wanted to do was lean against him and hold his hand. This started to freak me out! There must be something wrong with this drama group, it turns everyone into creepy people! I was becoming that stalker from an online chat room you were nice too ONCE and now they think you are meant to be together forever! Then, he offered to buy me a drink. The whole room went quite...
As I watched the tumble weed roll across the room, he got up and left for the bar. "Woah, how'd you do that?" the lovable grump next to me said. "Do what?" he leaned in close. "Take that as a compliment lass, he NEVER coughs up for drinks. Not for anyone!"
Everything resumed to it's normal status, and of course this sentence had gone straight to my head! Plus, when he came back from the bar he'd bought me a pint (which I'd been drinking) but had asked for a half pint so not to pee myself a mother load. He placed it down, smiled, and carried on talking. What's more he'd even come back and bought my mother a coffee. Equally amazing everyone, who then jumped in to see what free drinks they could get. This led to him walking us home, when something even more strange happened. We lived directly across from each other! How we had not met before was amazing? And then I didn't see him for almost two weeks... crap, I thought, I did manage to freak him out!
All of a sudden, Ralph started to speak... an actual conversation not directed by a script! I was mesmerized! I hung on every word he said, and all I wanted to do was lean against him and hold his hand. This started to freak me out! There must be something wrong with this drama group, it turns everyone into creepy people! I was becoming that stalker from an online chat room you were nice too ONCE and now they think you are meant to be together forever! Then, he offered to buy me a drink. The whole room went quite...
As I watched the tumble weed roll across the room, he got up and left for the bar. "Woah, how'd you do that?" the lovable grump next to me said. "Do what?" he leaned in close. "Take that as a compliment lass, he NEVER coughs up for drinks. Not for anyone!"
Everything resumed to it's normal status, and of course this sentence had gone straight to my head! Plus, when he came back from the bar he'd bought me a pint (which I'd been drinking) but had asked for a half pint so not to pee myself a mother load. He placed it down, smiled, and carried on talking. What's more he'd even come back and bought my mother a coffee. Equally amazing everyone, who then jumped in to see what free drinks they could get. This led to him walking us home, when something even more strange happened. We lived directly across from each other! How we had not met before was amazing? And then I didn't see him for almost two weeks... crap, I thought, I did manage to freak him out!
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| Left to Right: Wine on the bar where I worked. Ralph drinking coffee july/august 2011, and tables at my place of work at the time. |
One afternoon, he came up the street towards my work, at the time I didn't know this was out of the way for him, so I thought it was the norm and nothing special. I tried to drag him in for coffee and he declined. Most likely because my whole family had come to visit me at work that day! Bit intimidating even for me, and I'm related to them. I didn't see him until one day in the mid flow of lunch rush I turned around and there he was sitting straight in front of me at the bar. I almost choked! Not to be smug, but I was fairly good at my job, even in the lunch rush I still functioned well and actually quite enjoyed myself. But with him there, sitting, watching my EVERY MOVE I had to keep walking up the stairs to the kitchen to compose myself. Then after two drinks, he still hadn't really said much. Or asked a specific question. He'd been there taunting me for almost three hours!
Finally while I was emptying the bins he asked me what time I got off work. It was all I could do not to make a silly school girl noise, what on earth had come over me!? I've never acted like this and besides I pretty much thought he hated me the first time we met. I told him and he the proceeded to ask if I wanted to grab a drink at a local restaurant we have in town called "The Lounge" when I got off. I answered in the with the most stupid statement ever... "Yeah sure, but if I don't show up it's not because I stood you up, it's because I'm still stuck here mopping floors"
Aaaaaahhhh, what the hell!? If I don't show up, who says that!? You stupid, stupid woman! His face, and all he could say was "Okay..."
6 O'clock rolled round and my boss told me to leave in the nicest way possible"STOP! I'll get all that, you have to go meet that poor boy at the lounge or he'll really think you're standing him up!" I'd just finished cleaning the bathrooms, I was tired, my make-up had ran, I'm pretty sure I didn't smell too nice and my heart was beating like a bongo drum.
When I arrived I caught my reflection as I was walking in, I had panda face! Then without thought I did the worst thing possible and became my grandmother, licked my fingers and proceeded to wipe spit on my face!? Not realizing, he could probably see me through the window... luckily as I walked in he was looking at his phone, only he'd managed to change clothes, there was cutlery and food menu's all over the table... It was supposed to be JUST DRINKS!? He's all scrubbed up, with wine already on the table and I look like something the cat just dragged in. Is he being nice or doing this to torture me?
It wasn't just drinks, it was a beautiful main course, where we even tried each other's food (not something I usually feel comfortable doing on a first date) Two bottles of wine, coffee for dessert, and lots of conversation (no, not just from me lol) and not once did he look at me like I'd just had my hand down a toilet. We were the last ones to leave, and I expressed I didn't want to go home. He walked me around our whole town, where I then proceeded to take him to see the horses not far from our houses. It's where I used to go to get away from everything before we met. Funny considering I've always been slightly afraid of horses, I've been and handled loads of alligators, snakes, spiders etc. when I lived in Florida. Even dogs who had the potential of putting you in hospital when I worked in a humane society, but horses where what scared me the most. They're unpredictable, they know you better than you know yourself, and all they'd have to do is swing their head once at you and knock you out cold. I have a lot of respect for horses! They are majestic and very different from any other animal, and this scared me. So what better way to get over my fear than be alone with them whenever I can?
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| Left: Muffy my old neighbours horse. Middle & Right: The local Hydro horses. |
He stayed and fed the horses with me, then walked to the park where we sat and talked some more. I dragged the poor guy miles and miles and not once did he mention he had a torn ligament in his knee and possibly needed surgery. Was getting in my trousers really worth THAT much!? Apparently so, even though my trousers did stay fully attached to my body that night and not once did he initiate which of course made me think he was gay at one point, or that this was one big long drawn out bet of some kind... so of course I made the first move. Now looking back was pretty slick on his part, reverse psychology.
We were attached to the hip after that, and I didn't feel more comfortable any other way. It felt perfectly natural as if it had ALWAYS been that way. He would cook for me most nights, actually I'm really lucky, he still does. Probably because he'd have to eat crappy food if I cooked but still. We'd made "The Lounge" our place, and are now their regulars who get worried if we don't come in for awhile. I think the staff at "The Lounge" know more about us than we do, as they've been part of almost every moment in our relationship from the beginning. We then took the next step and decided to move in together not realizing they was easier said than done in our town. After four months of looking we still hadn't found a place, then out of the blue I got ill. I knew before I took the test, even though I'd been told I possibly would never have children due to a fibroid that burst in my right ovary causing a lot of damage that said may never heal. And Ralph had also been told he couldn't have children so we had both felt comfortable knowing that each other would never leave the other because of children. I guess in this rare case, two wrongs managed to make a right because on the 5th of December we found out we'd managed to prove all those doctors wrong. I was pregnant!
We were attached to the hip after that, and I didn't feel more comfortable any other way. It felt perfectly natural as if it had ALWAYS been that way. He would cook for me most nights, actually I'm really lucky, he still does. Probably because he'd have to eat crappy food if I cooked but still. We'd made "The Lounge" our place, and are now their regulars who get worried if we don't come in for awhile. I think the staff at "The Lounge" know more about us than we do, as they've been part of almost every moment in our relationship from the beginning. We then took the next step and decided to move in together not realizing they was easier said than done in our town. After four months of looking we still hadn't found a place, then out of the blue I got ill. I knew before I took the test, even though I'd been told I possibly would never have children due to a fibroid that burst in my right ovary causing a lot of damage that said may never heal. And Ralph had also been told he couldn't have children so we had both felt comfortable knowing that each other would never leave the other because of children. I guess in this rare case, two wrongs managed to make a right because on the 5th of December we found out we'd managed to prove all those doctors wrong. I was pregnant!
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| ALL: Our little tummy terror from 5 weeks - 31 weeks. |
Of course this then changed our preferences on what we were looking for in a home, which made it even harder to find our new place. But eventually we did, and we now live in a two bedroomed ground floor "flat". Of course we're still unpacking like any normal person who moves, I am not one of those people that moves everything in one day and manages to unpack in the next few days and it looks like they've been their years already!? Plus being pregnant I wasn't aloud to do anything anyway, so instead being yelled at constantly for moving boxes and doing this and that... Go make tea woman! I'm not used to standing around and doing nothing, being the first of four I automatically became the first boy and everything my father did, I did too. So to not be lifting couches, lugging boxes or putting up units with the boys felt VERY wrong and hard to take in. Not to mention hormones have completely taken over my ability not to get offended or feel sorry for myself. So feeling useless made me cry, not being able to put my own shoes on, makes me cry, so when it came to putting up the cot I took control and did it. Didn't tell anyone, just did it. IT FELT SOO GOOD! Yeah, I could still do normal things. Just that reassurance was all I needed even though I managed to break the baby mobile when attaching it to the cot, but I somewhat fixed that too! Woooo, I was empowered! Even though I got yelled at for putting up the cot without anyone there just in case. Boohoo, I'm fine aren't I? Well, as fine as I can be in the first place.
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| Left: The window of the nursery. Right: The nursery cot/bed I put up all by myself, yeaah...oh and the mobile I broke/fixed. |
Ralph and I have been together a year now, it's gone quick yet feels like we've been together since the beginning of time. Not in the way that we're completely sick of each other, but the more we're together the more reasons I find to love him. Which is the way it's supposed to go right? I did warn you there might be mushy posts as well as ranting, so don't say I didn't!
I am due in the next 8 or so weeks (August 10th 2012) with our first. We have decided not to find out the sex until s/he is born. It would feel like opening our Christmas presents before Christmas. But name's will be the death of me. We've managed to find something wrong with every name in existence! How I do not know? But if s/he's a girl then we have a name that's managed to stick, but of course that means we'll have a boy :D
So we are patiently waiting for our early Christmas present or late one considering we found out in December of last year. In the meantime, if you're really that bored you can wait with us. I will continue to post pointless things on here, discussions, rants, raves, and lots of photos as I am a photographer now for the second time (as I took a break but then missed it too much) but this time I've focused on Maternity and newborn photography more than anything else as children have always been easier to photograph than adults, for me anyway. Adults photo well when it's not about them in the photo, or the complete opposite WHEN IT'S ONLY ABOUT THEM. Where as children are curious about what they're aloud to do when having their photo taken, thus you get the most interesting expressions you've ever seen in your life. That's why children and elderly people are my favourite to photograph, it's the only times of our lives we actually know who we are at the time, everything else in between we seem to muck up, over think, like I'm doing with this wrap-up of a paragraph.
All in all, this is just some of our story so far (amazingly the shortened version.)
And I'm looking forward to adding sooooo many more chapters to it.
See you soon!
I am due in the next 8 or so weeks (August 10th 2012) with our first. We have decided not to find out the sex until s/he is born. It would feel like opening our Christmas presents before Christmas. But name's will be the death of me. We've managed to find something wrong with every name in existence! How I do not know? But if s/he's a girl then we have a name that's managed to stick, but of course that means we'll have a boy :D
So we are patiently waiting for our early Christmas present or late one considering we found out in December of last year. In the meantime, if you're really that bored you can wait with us. I will continue to post pointless things on here, discussions, rants, raves, and lots of photos as I am a photographer now for the second time (as I took a break but then missed it too much) but this time I've focused on Maternity and newborn photography more than anything else as children have always been easier to photograph than adults, for me anyway. Adults photo well when it's not about them in the photo, or the complete opposite WHEN IT'S ONLY ABOUT THEM. Where as children are curious about what they're aloud to do when having their photo taken, thus you get the most interesting expressions you've ever seen in your life. That's why children and elderly people are my favourite to photograph, it's the only times of our lives we actually know who we are at the time, everything else in between we seem to muck up, over think, like I'm doing with this wrap-up of a paragraph.
All in all, this is just some of our story so far (amazingly the shortened version.)
And I'm looking forward to adding sooooo many more chapters to it.
See you soon!
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